Trust

trust

–noun

1.  reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

2.  confident expectation of something; hope.

...

4.  a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.

 I have recently had my trust in someone tested, yet again.  And it has failed the test, yet again.  The initial time the trust was broken was years ago and over time I have tried to forgive and try to allow that trust to be regained. 
How does one regain trust that has been lost? 
Can lost trust be regained?

I have read many stories, articles, perspectives, opinions, and discussed with my best friends over many cocktails and the consenus is unanimous.  Yes, no, sometimes, and it depends.

The biggest factor that seems to contribute to the ability to regain trust is the commitment to rebuilding that trust on the part of the person who broke the trust in the first place.  The second biggest factor seems to be the willingness to forgive on the part of the person whose trust was broken. 

It depends was a very popular response -- it depends .... on what happened?  How often did it happen.  How big of a deal was it?  Was there regret, or remorse?

How do you regain the trust?  If there is remorse on behalf of the trust-breaker; and a willingness to forgive on behalf of the trust-breakee, you have a good start.  Then it takes a lot of time, honesty, communication and effort.

Strategies: 
Say what you mean.
Do what you say you're going to do, actions speak much louder than words.
Follow through on your word (your verbal commitments).
Look out for the other's well being.
Think about how your actions may make the other person feel, hurt or hinder the other person and make conscious decisions on your actions.
Go out of your way to put in the effort to rebuild the trust.
Know that it is going to take time.   Both must be committed to slowly rebuilding the trust.
One action that breaks the trust may require one hundred positive actions to rebuild it.
Communication, communication, communication.  Honesty, honesty, honesty.

After many "innocent" incidences (there is always some explaination ...) that have happened, and a lack of effort - sadly, I believe that our trust is beyond repair.  We need to be honest with each other and both commit to letting go and moving on.

Eat, Pray, Love

A couple of friends and I went to this movie last week and there were a couple of things that really hit me.  So much so that I've actually gotten a copy of the book and plan to read the whole thing!  I am not usually one to read the book, then see the movie.  I usually like books more than the movies.  I also dislike all of the "hype."  Eat, Pray, Love had a lot of hype -- probably by Oprah or something.  So, I avoided it.  Blah, blah, blah, girly book.  

Well, we saw the movie and I loved it (yea, it's easy to love when Julia Roberts is one of your idols too ...) but it was so powerful. So real.  So me.  Well, without the great year long soul-finding travel to beautiful places ... but you know what I mean.  

One quote that hit me the most was: 

"People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master..."
— Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love) 

Interesting concept.  I don't think I have found MY soul mate.  But I know I have been theirs ... not sure if they've been open to me being their soul mate, but I know I have done this for someone.  And, true enough ... it didn't last.  

Powerful.  I need to be more open to meeting a soul mate.  

Another simple thing for Happy People ... "Be Open to New Ideas"   

I'm ready. 

The 100 Simple Secrets of Happy People by David Niven, Ph.D

I found this book by David Niven a few years ago and recently saw it sitting in my bookshelf and figured it would be a perfect day to revisit it.  It's a very quick read and incredibly enlightening.  The lesson that hit home today was:

 

#37 - Don't let your entire life hinge on one element.  

"Your life is made up of may different facets.  Don't focus on one aspect of your life so much that you can't experience pleasure if that one are is unsettled.  It can become all you think about, and it can deaden your enjoyment of everything else - things you would otherwise love."

Feeling a lack of success and satisfaction in my personal life has been hindering me from enjoying my work life, my exercise life, my friends, my family, my vacations.  I keep thinking, "it would be really nice if I had someone to share this with," or "it would so much better if I had my significant other with me on this vacation." 

Low and behold, I could have had a really great vacation enjoying my family and friends.  I *did* have a great vacation, and I probably would have enjoyed it more had I gotten the whole "I'm sick of being single" thought out of my head the entire time.  Because the funny thing is, one of my girlfriends that I spent a lot of time with over vacation has been married for 4.5 years now and her husband does not enjoy traveling or doing things with her friends ... and she LOVED the time away from him. Here I'm wanting to be with someone and she's reveling in the time AWAY.  

Smile, laugh, have fun ... enjoy those around me that mean the most to me.  Now ... while I have the chance. 

Welcome to Spring ... now I need a summer vacation!

I have been planning my summer vacation, now that my trip over the 4th of July has gotten messed up by a team meeting in Salt Lake City (though the miles will be nice), and the change of my class reunion back two weekends.  So, I canceled my trip to Wisconsin over the Fourth, and I'm looking forward to 16 days up north in August instead! 

I'm teaching a class in Chicago in mid-August, so I figured it would be a great time to drive up to Wisconsin the week before, spend the week at the lake, then head five hours back to Chicago, teach my class (which happens to be at a pet-friendly hotel too!), then drive the 12 hours back to ATL on Saturday morning.  That's two full weeks away from the office and two full weeks traveling with the pups!! 

Now, I need to start getting a hold of people and schedule some time with my friends while I'm in town!  A week at the lake by myself will be incredibly boring, so I will need to get SOMETHING in the works.  Hmmm ... gotta get the brain ticking! 

Daughtry ... ear candy

I was just recently exposed to Daughtry - since I haven't watched Idol for the last few years.  I downloaded his two albums and have been smitten - and surprised at how much his lyrics spoke to my life.  

I listened to "Over You" on my way home from the gym tonight and it cut straight to the bone, and I'm glad that when I saw him for the first time in three years a few weeks ago - that I am over him.

Now that it’s all said and done
I can’t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I felt as if I was in way to deep
Guess I let you get the best of meeee

(Chorus)
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally gettin’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!
(End Chorus)

You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say,
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of other’s opened up
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for meee

(Chorus)
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo!
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I’m slowly getting closure
I guess it’s really over
I’m finally getting’ better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
‘Cause the day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you!!!
(End Chorus)

I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time agooo
And I never thought I’d doubt you
I’m better off without you

And I never saw it coming
I should have started running
I’m finally getting better
Now I’m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
And I got over you!!!
And I got over you!!!
And I got over you!!!

The day I thought I’d never get through
I got over you… 

(C)Daughtry, 2007 

Real Sun, Fake Sun and some Endorphins for Good Measure

It's amazing what a little sun will do for a person.  We have finally had some warm weather this weekend (62 today, and forecasted to be in the mid-upper 60's tomorrow too!  

It's been about 7 months since I've been tanning, so I went back to Planet Beach yesterday.  I got home from work and had every intention of going to the gym, but I was exhausted from getting up at 5:30am every day this week, so I took a quick cat nap on the sofa (you know ... cats sleep all day, so don't be surprised when my nap was 2.5 hours long!)  It made a HUGE difference in how I felt last night.  I was meeting the neighbors to go through some documents for the HOA, we were also going to celebrate a "win" against one of our residents that has a court judgment against her for $17,000 -- of which she has not paid a penny.  The water was shut off yesterday morning ... then promptly turned back on.  Grrrrrr ......

Since we were to meet over at AS's for the non-existent celebration at 7:30, I ran down to go tanning about 6:30 -- ahhhhh, it felt SO good to get back in the tanning bed!!!  I talked to Kelly for a while and caught up with her, she's so sweet.  She's letting me put some business cards there and see if I get any orders out of it!  She said she was going to order some for her mom in Michigan.  I got over to AS's about 7:30 and had a couple of bottles of wine, some appetizers and pizza.  I haven't eaten pizza in ages.  Good times with good girlfriends!  Really looking to margaritas on the patio at Uncle Julios tomorrow afternoon!  

Today I did 30 minutes on the step mill and lifted weights for about 45 minutes at the gym -- it felt great to get there and have a great workout!  I went tanning again this afternoon and headed to Whole Foods to pick up some peanut butter so I could make some dog cookies.  

I'm donating 300 bags of dog cookies to the American Cancer Society for their Bark for Life fundraising event next weekend.  I told Kenly I'd get them to her on Tuesday ... so this weekend was made for baking!  I have 5 batches done today, and 5 more to go tomorrow.  Then packaging everything up on Monday night after I print more bag labels on Monday.  I bet I will need to order more labels -- I should do a quick inventory tomorrow while I am finishing laundry too.

Overall, finally a warm weekend, plenty of sun, a couple of days at the gym, and some good sleep. Today is a good day.  Finally.  

In Search Of .... Motivation

The last few months have been tough to find the motivation I need in ..... life, in general.  It's been a tough couple of months.  I try to keep a smile on my face and be the good team player, but I've been struggling to be engaged in life. 


Things that have brought me pleasure in the past seem dull, boring, uninteresting. 
Things I have obsessed about in the past haven't even crossed my mind.

My passions in the past have been going to the gym 5+ days a week.  I'm lucky if I've gone five times in the last month.  I've gained weight, my clothes don't fit, I feel ugly ... and sadly I don't care.  Every day I know I need to go to the gym.  I need to go for a run.  I need to lift weights.  I need to go spinning.  I know it will make me feel better.  The endorphins are like a welcome, addictive drug ... but yet I'm not inspired. 

Hanging out with my friends has become a thing of the past.  I get home from work at night and I'm cold.  I get under the blanket on the sofa and I fall asleep.  I get home and I have no desire to even leave the house again.  I don't even want to take the dogs for a walk because it's too cold out.  This winter has been dreadful.  Days, upon weeks, upon nearly 3 months of COLD weather.  Barely a day over 40 ... nights in the low 20's.  I got the hell out of Wisconsin to get out of that weather, and the seasonal depression.  It NEEDS to get warm soon.  Saturday is finally forecasted for 60 degrees.  I hope that will take me out of my funk.  It's been TOO long since I have even remotely lived my life.  I have been miserable ... the warm weather needs to snap me out of it.

I talked to David tonight and told him I needed some motivation.  He gave me a great idea.  Get home from work, leave the car running ... take out the dogs, give 'em dinner, change clothes ... since the car is still running, I have to leave the house again ... why not just get into the nice warm car and go to the gym.  Brilliant David.  I will try that next week!  Thank you!! 

I think I also need to get back to the tanning bed.  Maybe a little vitamin d will do an ego good.  Maybe a week without a class, getting a little extra sleep and a better workout schedule and some sun will be good for me next week.

Another delicious Supper Club Night!

I am so grateful for my fabulous Supper Club friends! We always have such a great time, wonderful food, tasty wine, and outstanding conversation!

Last night I hosted dinner at my house, and our theme of the night was "Luau!" The menu was to die for:

Coconut Crusted Mahi-Mahi Bites with pineapple salsa
Kalua Pork
Kim Chi
Fruit Salad with a yogurt glaze
Rice salad with fresh pineapple, cherries, coconut
Grilled pineapple shortcakes

Everything was SO yummy - I will definitely be making all of these recipes again!

I made the Kalua Pork - if you'd like to make it at home:
4-6 lb. picnic ham or boston butt cut of pork
3 T. liquid smoke
1/4 c. brown sugar

Preheat over to 275 degrees. Trim the pork, and rub with liquid smoke and brown sugar. Wrap tightly in foil, place in a pan in oven for 5-7 hours (depending on the size of your pork) Approximately 1 hour per pound. Take out of oven, remove bone and shred with two forks.

You can also cook this on high in a crock pot for 6+ hours (until it is falling off the bone).

Ultra simple, and a fan favorite!

When in Shanghai ... you've gotta do .....

What to do in Shanghai

February 5, 2010

Some of the really cool things we did ... and things we didn't get a chance to do, but definitely put on your list if you're in town!

Yu Yuan Gardens: In the center of Old Town, just southwest of the Bund, the Garden of Peace and Comfort offers an escape from the fast pace of the surrounding city. With 30 pavilions and over 5 acres, this 16th century garden can be explored for days. Of the many temples and halls, the Grand Rockery is the most popular. Two thousand tons of rare yellow stones are combined with rice glue to form a massive sculpture that stands 46 feet high. There is also a lot of tourist shopping, with shops going on for what feels like miles! Since this is a very tourist area, be cautious on the prices you pay for souveniers.
The Bund: This famous waterfront has been Shanghai’s center since the mid-1800’s. It offers a taste of the past with the colonial structures along the promenade and a view of the future across the river in Pudong. The city’s historical landmarks as well as new 21st century structures can all be seen along the 1 mile walk. This is one of the oldest parts of Shanghai in the West River district called Puxi (Poo-shee)
The local alleyways: When you are in Puxi, near the Bund and Yu Yuan Gardens, walk around and take a look into some of the alleys. They will be selling foods, candied fruit on a stick or even critters on a stick. Most of these old apartments are only 1-2 rooms, and were built before they had indoor electricty and running water. Look around at the water spikets outside (where the residents get their water and take back to their apartment). Most families live together with an extended family - so it is not unlikely for a family of 6+ to be living in a small one room apartment here. Note the power lines strung all through the alleys to give the apartments electricity that was put in at a much later time.
ERA - Circus City: What an amazing show of Acrobatic Artistry! http://www.era-shanghai.com/en/
The Maglev Train to/from the airport: This is the world's fastest train. In 8 minutes you can go from Metro Line #2 station to the Shanghai Pudong Airport (PVG)! In a taxi, it's about a 40 minute drive! For 50RMB (about $7) you can take this elevated magnetic train and WOOOSH, you're at the airport!
Shanghai World Financial Tower Observatory: This was the slated to be the tallest building in the world when it went under construction in 1997. During the construction. the Asian Financial Crisis caused the work to cease for 2 years. The original design was 84 floors, which would have made it the tallest building in the world- the Patronas Towers in Kauala Lumpur opened in 1998 and beat the SWFT by 4 floors - so the redesigned the construction and added an additional 17 floors to the plan to top it out at 101 floors, which delayed construction an additional 4 years. Construction resumed in 2004, with the final floor being completed in 2007. The elevator was added in 2008, and it opened its doors on August 28, 2008. Due to a structural limit it never surpassed Taipai 101, it was officially opened as the 2nd tallest building in the world. Currently #3, after the Burj Khalifa building in Dubai opened in 2009.

Shanghai is the home to 13 of the top 200 tallest buildings.
Chicago is home to 13 of the top 200
New York City is the home to 16 of the top 200
Dubai is home to 25 of the top 200 --- CRAZY!!

Oriental Pearl Tower Observatory: Right down in the financial district of Pudong, the Oriental Pearl Tower is one of the most recongized icons of the Shanghai skyline.
Puxi (Pu-shee): The old town of Shanghai. Pu: "River" Xi: "West"
People's Square: Much like the Central Park+Times Square of NYC, the are around this large green space is filled with many businesses, shopping and of course ... the park. The comparable Square that you've probably heard of in Beijing is Tiananmin Square. Remember the student riots in Beijing in the late '90s?
The Fabric Markets: Have cashmere coats, rain coats, leather coats, shirts, suits, pants ... anything you want custom tailored to YOU! I highly recommend Sun Juan's store which is located on the 2nd floor (Store 250) of the Shanghai Shilupu Cloth Market at 168 Dongmen Rd in Puxi.
Science & Technology Museum: http://www.sstm.org.cn/structure/english2/eindex China is very focused on being bigger and better than anyone else. We never made it to the Museum, but the reviews are amazing! They have 5 main interactive exhibits and two 3D IMAX theaters.
Dongtai Road: http://www.time.com/time/travel/cityguide/article/0,31489,1851908_1851830_1851810,00.html We didn't make it here, but it is on the Top 10 list of many, many Top 10 lists! It looks very cool and it would have been fun to buy some more authentic stuff while we were here.
Blind Person Massage: For a mere 65RMB (about $10US) you can get a WONDERFUL 60 minute foot massage. For a great recommendation on masseuse: try #66, 36, 37, 10 or 26. They are all incredible!!! For such a cheap price - you can afford to get a massage every week!
Jade Buddha Temple: http://travel.yahoo.com/p-travelguide-2761785-jade_buddha_temple_shanghai-i;_ylt=AqJnPNsW7s9cYgYU_JznWBo4FWoL?rsort=helpful#descsummary We also didn't make it here, but have heard great things from some of my other colleagues who did get the chance to come here. Shanghai’s most famous temple is known for it’s white jade Buddhas carved from a single slab of Burmese jade. Brought to Shanghai in 1881, the statues are housed in separate houses amongst beautiful jewels and stones. In addition there are also ancient carvings, paintings and precious Buddhist cultural relics.
Xiang Yang Market: Or, better known as "the knock-off market". Located underground at the Science & Technology Metro stop - this place is HUGE! You can not cover the entire place in a few hours - but many of the stores carry the same things ... just different people selling. You can find almost anything you like - and it's all about the negotiations. The better you are, the better price you will get.
Super Brand Mall: http://www.superbrandmall.com/index/index_en.asp A HUUUUGE 10 story mall, with every store you can possibly imagine. They have many popular European and American stores

I'm sure there are a million more things to do while you are here, but these things will certainly take up a good portion of your time. Check the times that places are open. The Fabric Market closes at 6pm during weeknights, and the knock-off market closes at 8pm. So, you have to schedule your time accordingly. Our "normal" office hours here were 9am-6pm, so in order to get to the fabric market one weeknight, we had to leave the office by 5pm.


FYI - most of the taxi drivers do NOT speak any English, so make sure you have a "TAKE ME TO" taxi card. All businesses will have a taxi card (which are the size of a business card), so you can get to where you want to go and they are usually written in both English & Chinese. Make sure you have one for your hotel so you can get home!!!

Almost time to go HOME!!

Our final day to do ---- everything!

February 5, 2010

We wrapped up at work about 12:30 today, since our colleague was flying back to Singapore at 2pm, we presented our work to the VP on Thursday afternoon, made some requested tweaks to the presentation ... and sent it all for approval this morning.

So, you have a free afternoon in Shanghai, what do you do? GO SHOPPING! I had some last minute things I wanted to pick up for some people before I left just because I couldn't pass up the great prices.

100% cashmere pashminas for 25RMB each (I picked up so many colors!)
Beautiful tea cups for 25RMB each each (these are very cool you brew your loose tea in the cup)
UGG's slippers for 50RMB
Pearl necklaces and a jade pendant

Cheryl bought 3 Louis Vuitton knock off purses, and 3 Tods wallets for 1600RMB - this was AMAZING since they started at 3400RMB EACH for the purses ($525 US each)!! So she got them from over 10,000 RMB (over $1500 US) down to 1600 RMB (about $230 total)!!! I hope everyone she bought a purse for LOVES them!

She also picked up some North Face performance jackets for her nephews, some pashminas, a pearl necklace for her, tea cups, cell phone case, and she's looking for a computer bag for her sister - which she may go back for tomorrow.

The knockoff markets blow me away - every person working in every shop tries to pull you into their store "Lady lookie," or "Lady you want watch? You want handbag? You want shirt? You want DVD? You want .....

We took our goodies back to the hotel ... then faced with the incredible feat of PACKING it all! I found a couple of beautiful tea sets - but there was no way to get them home - they would have never fit in my bags!

If & when I ever come back to Shanghai -- I will have my shopping strategy all planned out (and more suitcase space ready for the goodies!)

Two interesting lunch experiences

Two interesting lunch experiences

February 4, 2010

I have to say after my last two lunches, I prefer Cantonese to Chinese cooking.

As a treat for the entire HR department, Winnie took everyone out for a Spring Festival luncheon. Chinese New Year begins on February 14th so the Shanghai offices will be closed the entire week of the 15th. It is tradition to have a celebratory lunch prior to the start of the new year (much like our Christmas parties, etc.)

We had lunch at a very upscale Chinese restaurant on the 9th Floor of the Super Brand Mall (very fascinating by the way ... http://www.superbrandmall.com/index/index_en.asp)

Everything we had was ordered for us and the entire group ate family style. They ordered many delicacies (probably on our behalf ... or just because it was a special occasion) and I'm usually willing to try almost anything - with a few exceptions. Three of those exceptions presented themselves at lunch yesterday: boiled chicken that still has feet (thankfully the head was gone), pigeons that have baked heads on the serving platter, and fish that still has it's head and fins. What are the odds of all three of those things showing up at once, right?

I will say that I did eat Duck's Tongue (yes, it did creep me out a bit - but if I closed my eyes, it didn't taste bad .... just a little tough). Oh yea, ate Ox tongue on my first day here too. I think I've had my fill of tongue for 2010. There was also a vegetable dish with a green that looked similar to collard greens (and kind of tasted the same) and bamboo. It was very good!

We learned two delicacies in Chinese culture include chicken feet, and salmon head. I just wasn't willing to go there. I did try a dessert dish that is called Ba bao fan, or "Glutinous Rice". It is basically little rice balls in a sweet, clear sticky sauce, The taste is ok ... but the consistency is ..... goopy. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glutinous_rice

Today's lunch was more Cantonese than Chinese -- and many more things I was willing to try!

We had a barbeque pork dumpling (but it was more like a stuffed bread/bun vs. a dumpling), pork dumplings with those same greens we had the previous day -- called qingcai. There was also a puffed pastry-type entree that also had pork in it. We had more of the "greens" - which were delicious when marinated in soy sauce. Poached chicken was on the menu (the only thing that kinda freaked me out, was that it was still on the bones - and it still had skin). Beef fried rice, a jello-ish mango/coconut dessert, a dessert cake that reminded me of hashbrowns ... but made from turnips.

I tried everything today - with the exception of the stuff with shellfish, oh yea ... and the duck's feet (yes, they were webbed .... eeeek!) - and it was all yummy!

I will be happy to get back to my regular diet of boneless, skinless chicken breast with a box of Green Giant veggies! We had dinner at Julie & Ken's house last night -- order in NY Style Pizza. In my top 5 favorite meals this trip :) Julie also made us a fabulous salad - with all veggies. I am going to start making this at home ALL the time now - it was SO good! Basically a Greek Salad: cucumbers, onions, red, gred and yellow peppers, tomatoes and vinaigrette. Yep, that will be my new favorite lunch from now on!!

Picking up the custom-made coat!

Back to the Shanghai Shi Liu Pu Fabric Market

February 4, 2010

We went back to visit Sun and Lu Ling to pick up my coat, Cheryl's rain coat, Jean's rain coat and Mike's 7 tailored shirts. We were hoping to get out of the office by 4pm today so we didn't have to rush to get across the river to Puxi (Pu-shee).

By the time we got out of our meeting with Winnie, the VP of Talent Development, Greater China (the person who brought us over to work on this project ...) it was 3:30pm and we had a few things we needed to brush up on our presentation before she could pass it on to our EVP in London. She gave us GREAT kudos on the work we've accomplished in the last two weeks and she loved all of our recommendations! Weee!

Winnie was also SO sweet, as a thank you for our help on the project - she bought each of us a very traditional tea set from the Porcelain City (in the Jingdezhen province / south east China). It has been known by this name ever since the Song Dynasty with a history of making porcelain items for over 1700 years (around 300 AD)

We got out of the office by 5:10pm and had to get across the river before the market closed at 6pm! We grabbed a taxi and he took us to the spun market (a fabric market ... but not OUR fabric market!) So, I showed him Sun's business card again ... and he was not too happy with us! I just knew we were not in the right place when we were going down some very UN-familiar roads!!

We finally made it to the right place at 5:40pm. Two girls were about to jump in our cab - and THANKFULLY they spoke English so we asked them to ask the taxi if he would stay and wait for us for 10 minutes while we were inside - then take us back to our hotel. She explained and he agreed. YAY!!

We picked up my coat and Jean's coat. Cheryl needed a minor alteration on the buttons ... and Mike's shirts were not done - so Julie & Cheryl will need to pick them up this weekend instead. No rush, since CK, the guy who was going to take them back to Singapore - is going to Tokyo instead tomorrow. So, we'll just have to ship Jean & Mike's stuff to the office.

I've attached a couple of photos ... fun pink cashmere coat, with a leopard lining! All hand picked and made just for me. It's a one of a kind (how cool is that??)

EXPO 2010

EXPO 2010

February 2, 2010

Everywhere we go in Shanghai, there are advertisements for Expo. While we were here, we have been asking what it is, why it's here, how long it lasts, why Shanghai, etc.

I've been meaning to Google it - and tonight I finally remembered. So, I'll share!


Today, Expo is the modern version of the World's Fair. It is held randomly (sometimes 2 years between Expos, sometimes 10 years between them). I don't remember ever hearing anything about it at home and wasn't sure if it had been hosted in the States since the infamous 1904 St. Louis World's Fair, or the 1939 New York City World's Fair.

The easiest thing I could related Expo to is Epcot Center in Orlando. Each country that participates builds an exposition building to promote their country's image and accomplishments. At the 200 Expo, each exposition display was averaged at $13M. Some countries didn't think this was worth the investment and they wouldn't get back a good return on their investment. However, Dutch research estimates $35M investment and the exposure they received at the Hanover Expo (Germany) in 2000 brought back over $350M in tourism revenue.

EXPO 2010 in Shanghai will start in May, and run for 6 months. This should bring great tourism revenues into the city, and also great exposure to a city that has been hugely developed in the last 10 years.

So, where has Expo been held in the last 35 years you may ask?? (I certainly did ...)

• 1974 Spokane (United States)
• 1982 Knoxville (United States)
• 1984 New Orleans (United States)
• 1985 Tsukuba (Japan)
• 1986 Vancouver (Canada)
• 1988 Brisbane (Australia)
• 1990 Osaka International Gardens and Greenery Exposition (Japan)
• 1992 Seville (Spain)
• 1993 Daejeon (South Korea)
• 1998 Lisbon (Portugal)
• 1999 Kunming International Garden Festival (China)
• 2000 Hannover (Germany)
• 2005 Aichi (Japan)
• 2008 Zaragoza (Spain)
• 2010 Shanghai (China)
• 2012 Yeosu (South Korea)
• 2015 Milan (Italy)
• 2016 Antalya (Turkey)
• Expo 2017 yet to be designated
• Expo 2020 yet to be designated

Who knew we actually hosted it three times in a row!!! I don't remember hearing ANYTHING about this while I was growing up! Interesting stuff!

12 Chinese Phrases you need to know

12 Chinese Phrases You Need to Know

February 2, 2010

How are You? Ni Hao Ma
Also commonly shorten to Ni Hao. (pronounced: knee-how)
This is likely to be the first Chinese words that you will ever need to learn. Useful as a greeting or a ice-breaker. Suitable for use with all ages and professions. Remember to use the Chinese phrase, Ni Hao, whenever you meet a Chinese friend or neighbor.

Thank You. Xie Xie. (pronounced: shay-shay)
Another polite term that is easy to remember and use.

Very Good. Hen Hao. (pronounced: hen how)
This is useful when giving praise for a job or task well done. Also useful as a reply to anyone who says "Ni Hao?' to you.

No Good Bu Hao. (pronounced: boo-how)
This is useful when there is a need to comment on a shoddy or incomplete job or task.

Very Expensive. Hen Gui. (pronounced: hen-gwee)
When bargaining at the shops, this is the best term to use when driving a hard bargain. We found this VERY useful!!!

Don't want or No. Bu Yao. (pronounced: boo-yow)
This is the best term to use for touts - street hawkers who approach you at every tourist stop to ask you to buy things. Bu Yao....will stop them in their track.

This is beautiful. Hen Piao Liang. (pronounced: hen-pea-yow-lee-yang)
Use this phrase to praise something that is nice or beautiful. May also be used when meeting a pretty girl too!

Taxi. Di Shi. (pronounced: dee-she)
Di Shi is the correct term but you should be understood even if you use the English word for Taxi. They sound alike anyway.

Good Bye. Zai Jian. (pronounced: zhai-gee-ahn)
Well, I guess this is another term that will be easily understood even if the English word is used.

Excuse Me. Jie Guo. (pronounced: ghee-jew-oh)
There is always a crowd in touristy areas. There are so many Chinese who wants to see the same monuments too. Rather than push your way through the crowd, using the term Jie Guo may just open the path ahead for you!

Receipt. Fa Piao. (pronounced: fa-pie-ay-oh)
Always ask for the receipt or Fa Piao at the shops or from a taxi. This may be useful if you need to complain about a fraud or shoddy product. Also useful if you leave behind your bag or camera in the taxi.

I don't want. Wo Bu Yao. (pronounced: whoa-boo-yow)
Useful when refusing a tout or when offered a drink too many at the Dinner table.

Local Shanghai Experience

Local Shanghai Experience

February 2, 2010

I promised you a local Shanghai experience and sadly, I haven't been able to get it on video (at least not as good of a demonstration of that experience that we've actually had!!)

So, the one thing you really need to get used to when coming to Shanghai is the driving. We've been taking a taxi to/from the office every day and also back to the hotel from Julie & Ken's house at night. On the weekend Julie & Ken's driver has taken us around to do shopping, etc. The ride is certainly memorable!!

• Lanes here -- they're just a suggestion.
• The side of the road you drive on -- yea, that's a suggestion too.
• Cars just park in the right lane. So, you'll have a travel lane -- and there's just a parked car there. So, other cars have to go around.
• If there is two feet between you and the car ahead of you -- someone will merge in.
• They DO obey the red lights ... well, unless they're turning right - then they just go without stopping.
• They swerve in and out of lanes, just to get ahead of one car.
• People in crosswalks: great moving targets.
• Mopeds: easier targets (they're bigger)
• They turn left - even if there is traffic coming. They'll stop, right??

Pedestrians get hit by cars REGULARLY here! The cars/drivers don't care! Mopeds and bicycles drive the wrong way down the wrong side of the road - coming straight at you. Many mopeds (which is a primary form of transport here) don't even have headlights (or they just don't work) so you can't see them coming.

Oh yea, add to that - most people wear dark coats ... so at night, you can't see them either!

I'll have to figure out how to post a video - it's not nearly as exciting as a few of the rides we've taken (sadly, the one day I videoed our taxi ride ... it was raining, so not as many mopeds, not as many pedestrians, and not as many cars.)

As you are watching - we will be making a right hand turn (on a red light - note we do not stop ... we just merge into the oncoming traffic). But keep an eye on the silver van which is turning left onto the road we are turning off of (so they are basically coming toward us). There is traffic driving on the left side of the van AND the right side of the van. They are RIGHT in the MIDDLE of the road ... not in their lane - in the MIDDLE of the road - and people just drive around them like it's no big deal!!!

Then at the very end, you can see how we cut in front of a bus ... it was literally FIVE FEET from my door -- and not slowing down!!

What a Circus!!

What a Circus!

February 2, 2010

On Sunday night, we went to ERA - A Tradition in Time, which is a local circus show. It's much like Cirque du Soliel, but focusing on individual circus acts, with less of an ongoing story.

The show is in a small theater which holds about 2000 people, so even seats in the very last row are very close to the action and have a great view!

The ongoing thread of a story was based on the evolution of Chinese traditions through the last hundred years.

The show started with a "hand-balancing" act, where the acrobat balanced on one hand on a rotating pillar (only large enough to put their hand!) She then was displaying incredible feat of strength and balance throughout the act!

The next act was a "teeterboard" act where the acrobat balanced a board on a metal cylinder and stood on it. Then he added 4 glasses to and another board to make the teeterboard more challenging. Then another 4 glasses and board (now to three levels high) ... and then another. He is now balancing on a board which is four levels high (see attached photo). Next, he threw a bowl up and caught it on his head!! Then he balanced another bowl on his foot - and tossed it in the air -- and caught it on his head! Then he balanced 2 bowls (at the same time) on his foot, tossed them into the air -- and ... you guessed it ... caught it on his head! Then 3 bowls, then four! He now has 10 bowls balancing on his head, while he is balancing on the teeterboard. Then he took a TEAPOT, balanced it on his foot ... and caught it inside the 10 stacked bowls on his head! Then he took a spoon, balanced it on his foot, tossed it in the air, and caught it in the teapot, inside the 10 stacked bowls ... ON HIS HEAD! WOO!!! Very cool!

The third act included 10 acrobats, imitating two gangs, challenging each other to a showdown. Each person tried to outdo the next to prove their gang was better than the other. This was all done in the competion of acrobatics jumping through hoops. Leaps, tumbles, flips -- all through sets of hoops. Great showing!

The fourth act is something called "Adagio" - which is the classic two person acrobatic team where they do amazing balancing acts! This is the very common acts that you will see when one person is balancing on the other person's foot or shoulders while being suspended in the air. The strength these people have is just amazing!

The fifth act was a guy throwing and balancing large ceramic pots. Catching with his shoulder, head, spinning the pots, rolling from one arm to the other, etc. Cool - but this wasn't really all that.

The last act before the intermission was the "Wheel of Death" - I caught my breath SO many times during this act - I thought for sure someone was going to fall and get hurt! This was a large wheel with 3 smaller wheels inside (much like a ferris wheel) and the acrobats would spin the wheel faster and faster then would do acrobatic acts on the OUTSIDE of the wheel while it was spinning around at least 100' above the ground. It was so scary!!



After the 10 minute intermission, we came back with another Adagio act, but this time it was three people. Simply amazing to see how strong these people are!


The seventh act was VERY cool - with a seesaw as the launching pad, two acrobats would jump onto the see-saw, and launch another acrobat high into the air and he would do flips and crazy acrobatic acts ... and land on a target. They were launching guys on pogo sticks, stilts, and launching someone into a chair, which was being held by another guy! VERY cool!

The eighth act was something I remember from Celebrity Circus - the Bungee Trapeeze. The girls were very strong and graceful - a beautiful demonstration!!

The ninth act was the trampoline ... one of my favorites! Crazy flips and jumps! 1080, double twist, pike position ... it was like watching the freestyle skiing or snowboarding ...but on trampolines!

The second to last act was a beautiful love story acted out on the air silks. This is where the acrobats merely wrap their arms in long silk scarves and they fly through the air - with almost nothing holding onto them!

The last act - and the coup de tete was the sphere cage. They put one motorcycle in the cage and around they went in the cage. Then they added another ... and another. All the way up to EIGHT motorcycles in the sphere cage at ONE TIME!! They were literally inches from each other and they didn't crash!! It was SO amazing!!!!

Sunday - more exploration in Shanghai

Rainy Sunday

January 31, 2010

"I Pray that it's raining on Sunday
Stormin' like crazy
We'll hide under the covers all afternoon
Baby whatever comes Monday
Can take care of itself
'Cause we've got better things that we can do
When it's raining on Sunday"

... yep, and our better things to do were to SHOP!! In the dreary, cold Sunday weather. It's about 40 degrees today and blah outside.

We met Julie at Starbucks (shocking, huh?) and walked around a little mall which is near Parker & Jarod's school (since Parker had a basketball game today). We picked up some fun Chinese New Year decorations, DVD cases (so we don't get busted with the movies we picked up last weekend), tshirts and other gifts. We had an appointment for 2pm to have a shampoo and shoulder massage while Julie had her hair cut. This tiny salon specializes in shampoos (who knew that people went to a salon, just to get a shampoo and leave?)

Well - the shampoo was not just a shampoo, it's a 30-40 minute head and shoulder massage while that suds up your hair. It was SOOO relaxing!! 40 RMB for a shampoo and massage (about $5 US)

We got back to the hotel about 4pm, we will head down for a quick dinner in the restaurant before Derek picks us up to go to ERA. This is a Chinese Circus - and I'm not really sure what to expect other than I think it's the Chinese acrobats - much like Circque du Soliel. I will be taking pictures of that tonight :)

Dinner in 5 minutes - so I'll post pictures of the show tonight when I get home!!

Have a great, relaxing Sunday all!

If it's Saturday, it must be shopping!

If it's Saturday, it must be shopping day!

January 31, 2010

Saturday was AWESOME! We started off early at 9am when Derek picked us up at the hotel. We went over to Starbucks to grab a coffee, then off to the Fabric Market to pick up Cheryl's two suits and her cashmere coat that she had tailor made last weekend. They looked AWESOME! Cheryl decided to also have a rain coat made, Jean also custom made a rain coat, I ordered a cashmere coat, and Mike ordered 7 tailored shirts. Mike's shirts were CUSTOM made -- $9 each. You pick the fabric, the color, the collars, the cuffs. If you want a different fabric on the INSIDE of the cuffs, they can do it! Monograms, no monograms -- you want it, you got it. My coat ended up being 580 RMB - tailor made CASHMERE coat for $90 US Jane's rain coat was 500 RMB - $77 US Everything we had custom made will be ready to pick up on Thursday night. The tailor will be BUSY this week! 3 coats and 7 shirts!

Next, we went over to Julie & Ken's condo to pick up Ken & the kids. We were dropped off at the fake market for some souvenir shopping; Ken & Parker went back to the skate park. The traffic was horrible on Saturday. Not sure why so many people were out and about - might be because of the start of the Chinese New Year holiday where many people will go home and visit family for 2-6 weeks. We went to the underground fake market - this place is AMAZING! We barely saw 1/100th of the entire place, but it's like a little mall. Everyone has their own shop and everyone makes their own rules. Thankfully Julie was with us, and she could give us recommendations on how much we should be paying for things. EVERYTHING goes on negotiation. I picked up some silk scarves, a few cashmere pashminas, some UGG's slippers (these are WONDERFUL!!), and a few tea cups. We were only down there for about two hours and Cheryl had a lot of specific things she was looking for for her nephews. She picked up a backpack, some bags (that fold up into very small containers), fake Oakleys, pashminas, slippers and some Pandora beads. The place was just wild. They probably had everything you could imagine down there, but we just didn't have enough time to look.


Next was off to Eyeglass City so Cheryl could pick up some frames. I also ended up getting a new pair of frames (I will have the lenses put in at home). The frames I picked up were 150 RMB - or $27 US. They had EVERY possible frame you could imagine. Three floors of eye glass stores everywhere. It's like 3 floors of Pearl Vision stores! The traffic on the way to Eyeglass city was horrendous - Julie said it normally takes about 40 minutes to get there and it took us almost an hour and a half. We went through some VERY poor parts of town, I wish I could have gotten some pictures! But, very hard to take pictures from the back of a van. Eyeglass City is also right next to the bus and train station. So since it's so close to Chinese New Year, people are starting to travel to visit their families. There were thousands of people walking down the street with luggage - actually causing a traffic jam. Add to that ... the entire road was under construction!

There was an accident on the highway that we saw - someone had rear ended another car. But then we think we know why that might have happened. There was a guy standing on top of a 25ish story building. Just looking over the side ... it looked like he was going to jump!! Not sure if he did or not, because I didn't watch the news in the mornning (who knows if that would even make the news here?) While we were inside, a motorcycle cop got too close to Derek's van and scratched it with his handlebars. Derek stopped him and asked him what was up ... and the cop said "Well, you shouldn't have been parked there" Nice, huh?

We got back to Julie & Ken's apartment and Ken made us a great American dinner: wings, potato salad, baked beans and beer. How funny - I feel like we're back in 1975 - check out the pull tabs! Everything was home made and it was DELISH!!! I don't eat wings, so Julie made me a big salad of green and yellow peppers, onions, tomatoes, and chicken. It was SO yummy - the first vegetables that I've eaten since I've gotten here. (they said not to eat any fresh veggies 1) because of the water they're washed in, 2) because of the soil they're grown in). Julie & Ken have a little organic market near their building and she said everything they get there has been great. It was SO good to eat some veggies last night! We got back to the hotel about 10pm and I crashed since we were going shopping again on Sunday.

Friday Night - Girly Night ... Shanghai Style!

Friday night girly night

January 31, 2010

Friday was TGIF at the office. The last Friday of each month, they have a gathering to celebrate all of the birthdays for the month, they have snacks (KFC, pizza, fruit, cakes), beer and soda.

After TGIF, Mike & Jean (from the Singapore office), Julie, Cheryl and I went to have manicures and pedicures. We stopped in this little salon. Mike, Julie & Jean had manicures. Cheryl had a pedicure and I needed to have my nails filled and one nail repaired that I broke just before leaving the US. Manicures were 88 RMB (about $13.50 US), Pedicures were 168 RMB (about $26 US) and my gel fill (instead of acrylics) was 350 RMB (about $50 US). I was shocked that it was THAT expensive, considering I pay $30 at home to have my nails taken off and redone. But, they were going on 4 weeks -- so I needed to have them done. EVERYTHING was done by hand, all filing, trimming, buffing, everything. No dremmel tools here! The fill looks OK, but I'm not overly happy with it - so I will be having them redone once I get home.

After that, we stopped at Johnny Moo's for dinner (the exact concept of Johnny Rockets - burgers, milkshakes, fries). It was a very good burger - the fries were yummy, but I tried to limit myself to only a few! They also had fountain diet coke which was delish!






Finally we went back to Blind Persons Massage for another hour long foot massage. Oh -- it's like HEAVEN!! They start with a 10 minute shoulder massage while your feet are soaking in hot water. Then you sit back in a very comfortable recliner, put your feet up and they massage your feet for 50 minutes! It is the BEST! And, you can't beat 65 RMB for an hour -- which is about $10. I could have sat there all night, I was like putty after they were finished! It's so funny there, but all of the employees have numbers - so they don't go by names, when you call for an appointment ... you ask for your person's number! I had 66 when Ken, Cheryl and I went last weekend. Friday night I had 26. He was good, but I liked 66 better. Julie and Ken have their favorites that they always use: 36, 37, 10.


We got back to the hotel about 10pm and I crashed -- after a looooong foot massage I was so relaxed and ready for bed. Saturday - shopping day ... gotta rest up!

Planning for the weekend ...

Weekend Plans ...

January 28, 2010

We've been working with Julie to schedule our weekend plans. We have lots of great things planned!!

Tonight, people from the office have coordinated a Karaoke night for all of the visitors (we are here, plus some others from the Singapore office) - so we are going out for dinner, drinks ... and yes, karaoke. We'll see what THAT is all about! Someone mentioned that each group gets a private room, so you are not singing in front of a huge room of patrons. I will definitely be taking pictures tonight!

Tomorrow we have 6 interviews scheduled during the day, so we will be very busy and we have to be wrapped up by 5pm to enjoy the company Happy Hour. On the last Friday of every month, they celebrate birthdays, anniversaries and have a happy hour in the office with food, beer and wine. (Much like our denim day/casual Friday ... but with beer and food!) Tomorrow night, we have manicures and pedicures scheduled (finally - I broke one of my nails before I left and did not have a chance to get it repaired before leaving) and I've been dealing with a broken nail the entire week! And another fabulous foot massage.

Saturday will start early, dropping off the kids at the skate park, then off to the fake/knock-off market, flower market, fabric market and EyeGlass City (where you can get very, very cheap glasses - like $60 glasses that would normally be $350 in the US). We'll pick up the kids from the skatepark and have lunch at Johnny Moo's (exactly the same branding as Johnny Rockets!)

Sunday - Parker has a basketball game, so we will hit Jenny the movie lady again (any requests .... ask now, or forever hold your peace). There are a couple of other stores Julie said she would take us to, then Sunday night we are going to ERA - Intersection of Time. It's a Chinese Acrobat show - much in the realm of Cirque du Soliel. Can't wait for that!! $50 tickets -- CHEAP compared to Cirque in Vegas at $150!!

I will definitely have pictures coming ...

Day 2 - Shanghai

Day 2 - Sunday in Shanghai

January 24, 2010

Today I got up early (considering I fell asleep at 7:45pm last night) and went down to the gym in the hotel and ran my 5k. It's amazing how much easier it is to run 3.14 miles when it's counting off in kilometers - because the treadmill ticks up so much faster in K's than miles!

I will need to take some pictures of the gym tomorrow morning - while they have a huge selection of equipment, it's all circa 1983! It's actually amusing! They have an aerobics room with a VHS player and workout videos. The selection included: Cindy Crawford's aerobic video and Christy Brinkley's workout video. (again, circa 1983!)

We met in the restaurant for breakfast and I tried some white fruit that was speckled with little black seeds. It almost reminded me of kiwi, but white instead of green. It's called Dragon Fruit and it didn't have much flavor - but very interesting to look at!

We met up with Ken and the kids to go to Parker's basketball game and see their school. Since we had time, we were dropped off at mall which was attached to a grocery store (check out some of the pictures from the market!) It was wild!! We then went to Parker's game (they won!) and then met up with Jenny to buy some movies.

I didn't go quite as crazy as Cheryl (buying 116 movies!!) - I picked up 20, plus the entire series of Sex in the City. You'll be shocked at the titles I picked up on DVD and BluRay:
Thank you for Smoking, Angels & Demons, Disney's Earth, The Dark Knight, Gran Torino, Confessions of a Shopaholic, He's Just not that into You, Marley & Me, The Bucket List, Sunshine Cleaning, Sideways, Santa Buddies, Sex in the City movie, The Invention of Lying, Sherlock Holmes, The Lovely Bones (just came out in the theaters two weeks ago), Julie & Julia, It's Complicated (out only 3 weeks), The Blind Side (all for about $1-2 each). I spent about $40 US to get 20 movies, plus the entire tv series!

If anyone has any requests - let me know, we're going back next weekend! They have TONS of entire series from TV, HBO, Showtime, etc. - all for about $5-12 each.

We went to another Mart (much like a Sam's Club or Costco), went back to the apartment, had some GREAT dinner and watched Sherlock Holmes.

Off to work tomorrow - lots of meetings set up for this week. I'm sure we'll find some things to do in the evenings as well. More photos to come ...

Country #14 ... China

As part of my job, I am lucky enough to be able to travel around and see various parts of the world. This year, I was given the opportunity to travel to Shanghai, China for 17 days. It was an amazing experience, and while I was there, I kept a blog in Shutterfly (as Blogger, Facebook and Multiply are blocked by the Chinese government) ... I am going to copy and paste my blog.

Enjoy ...

Day 1 in Shanghai -

January 23, 2010

Today, we met up with Ken B (we used to work with his wife in Atlanta) - she's been relocated over here for three years already - so they're almost like locals!

Ken took us to the fabric market and Cheryl ordered a coat and two suits to be custom made. The options were overwhelming! You could pick this style of coat, with this type of a collar, and that kind of detailing, at whatever length you want ... then throw in the color and fabric that you want. WAY too many choices! But, a hand-made cashmere LONG coat - for about $110 USD. Suits were about $90US

We went back to Ken & Julie's apartment (WOW, what a great view!!) to pick up the kids and go to the skatepark - the largest skateboarding park in the world. The boys stayed there all day - we went down to Yu Yuan Gardens -- the big tourist shops (not that we bought anything there, but the maze of stores was amazing!) We'll be heading to the knock-off markets later this week or next weekend with Julie to get our souveniers!

We also walked through a very old part of town which shows how people USED to live downtown - now with the real estate being what it is, these places are being shut down, tore down ... and redeveoped into luxury apartments, restaurants and shops instead. Most of the old housing is 1 room, no electricity, no indoor plumbing or water. Those things were added later on - and there are wires running from house to house to incorporate electricity into the tiny houses. Their water is from taps out on the street, and I'm not really sure where they go to the bathroom with no toilets INSIDE the units ....

After the markets (most of which were outdoor markets), we were pretty cold (temps today were about 40 degrees), we walked back to Ken & Julie's apartment, took the ferry across the river and grabbed something to eat back at their house. We made an appointment for an hour long foot massage and headed over to "Blind Persons Massage" - yes, some of the masseuses are blind! The hour long massage was SO relaxing, I might have even dozed off for a little while! The massage was $65RMB ... which equates to about $8 US! ... we'll be getting another foot massage before we leave!!!